I wanted to be a Car Designer...

For most of my life, I've aimed for a humourous or witty reply to questions posed to me. It wasn't always that way. When I was much younger, I was known for being very serious and for always saying exactly what was on my mind. But if I was relating a deep personal goal with what I thought was great sincerity, it would strike my listener's funny bone a mighty blow, much to my chagrin!

Example No. 1
I was a little over ten years old when I was asked to appear on local television on behalf of the Kelowna Boys' Club. I was there representing the "Rock Hound Club." Preparing for this honour, I'd collected the really cool rocks I wanted to show to the TV audience. I thought the best way to get all these rocks to the studio would be to stuff them ALL into the pockets of my jeans.
There we were, on live TV, and Paul Orvin, the interviewer was working his way down the row of boys representing, The Leatherwork Club, The Watercolour Paint Club, The Carpentry Club, and finally me for the Rock Club. My first time on live TV was more than a bit nerve-wracking. Paul knew I was the kid for rocks (maybe it was the big sign they'd stuck on my chest stating "Rock Hound") that clued him in. Anyway, he asked if I'd brought any rocks to show. "Yes I have," I replied, desperately trying to pry them out of my pockets. When they would not budge, I came to the realization I had gotten them all in my pockets by undoing my belt and unzipping the fly on my pants. There was NO WAY any of those rocks were coming out of my pockets unless I released my belt, etc. I was not prepared to do that on live TV, so I sheepishly told Mr. Orvin I couldn't get them out of my pockets. With a smile and a giggle he said, "That's OK, perhaps I can just ask you what you want to be when you grow up."
A wide smile crept across my face, I knew I had the perfect answer to this question. You see, I had just been learning about the Olympics and what the difference was between being amateur and professional. Also, just the day before, my brother and sister had taught me all about the Olympic sport we now call the "Long Jump." Turns out, for my age, I was quite good at what we then called the "Broad Jump." So, in a loud confident voice, and in keeping with my keen interest in rocks as well as my new-found jumping skill, I proudly announced I wanted to be, "A Professional Geologist and an Amateur Broad Jumper!" I was completely mortified by the immediate reaction my profound personal revelation created in the interviewer, cameraman and the rest of the crew. I was hurt and just didn't get what was so funny? Now I do.
Geology and competing in the Olympics was just a passing fancy, so I don't think I was permanently harmed in any way by my TV appearance. It was though, the start of my wariness to share my hopes and aspirations.

Example No. 2
I'm now in the ninth grade, age fifteen. The year, when you're supposed to decide what you're going to do with your life. What a helluva burden to put on someone who's just discovered hair growing where there never was before, that GIRLS are interesting and that everyone thinks you're ugly and hates you for it. Not a great time to be asking someone to be setting life-altering career goals.
Anyway, that's how it was done back in the olden days. Each of us had a private appointment with "The Guidance Counsellor." For me, my thing was cars, I can't remember when I didn't like looking at cars. Now, I can turn a wrench if I have to, but I'm much more interested in the look of cars than fixing them or making them go faster. So, when Mr. Wood (an appropriate name that dunderhead) asked me in his bored monotone voice, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" I thought, here's my chance to start my chosen profession, this man is going to tell me how I go about achieving my goal. "Well sir," I began, "I'd really like to be an automotive stylist." Mr. Wood looked up at me, and after a brief moment, burst our laughing! The rest of the interview was a complete blur. I don't remember anything else he said, all I knew was that my dream was impossible. Thank you Mr. Wood you blockhead!

1963 Corvette Sting Ray

Looking back, I now know I shouldn't have taken his response so seriously. But back then, at that time in my life, it turned my applecart end for end, and I abandoned all efforts to becoming what is now called a Car Designer.

Nowadays, in thirty seconds, a young person can google a list of about twenty schools that specialize in automotive design. The premier one in North America being The Art Center College of Design in Pasadena, California. Their Transportation Design program has turned out many prestigious automotive designers.

The original Morris Mini Minor

In my world, Car Designers are celebrities. I never became one, but my lifetime of creative work in other fields has enabled my "eye" when it comes to really looking HARD at a car, which is something I constantly do. It's often said, "The Devil is in the details," – that is more true in car design than any other creative field I know.

When a new car is about to be introduced, I spend hours on the web trying to find a spy shot of same. I've enjoyed looking at the just announced 2016 smart fortwo (see my last post) and I can't wait till September 3rd for the new Mazda Miata to be revealed. Mazda has shown us the new chassis of the car and also has posted on youtube what the engine sounds like. Soon we'll see little teaser shots of details of the car. They have me hooked, I could be their favourite customer, sleuthing out details on the new model. I'll be the first in the showroom when an actual car arrives, grinning ear to ear while I study it, end to end. The salesmen in the showroom will be rubbing their hands in glee, knowing I'll just have to have that car. Alas, they'll soon realize, I'm just there to LOOK at the car, not buy it.

1969 Datsun 240Z aka Fairlady Z

Although I admire their products greatly, good car design isn't exclusive to exotic marques like Ferrari, Lamborghini, Aston Martin and Porsche, it includes landmark designs like Sir Alec Issigonis original 1959 Morris Mini Minor; Albrecht Goertz 1969 Datsun 240Z; Larry Shinoda's 1963 Corvette Sting Ray and his legendary 1969 Mustang Boss 302. But the car whose image is forever burned into my memory, simply by its absolutely perfect line and proportion is Ettore Bugatti's beautiful 1932 Type 50.

1932 Bugatti Type 50

Many people say modern cars all look alike. That's somewhat true, since the designers are all working to maximize aerodynamic efficiency; meet crash and safety standards; utilizing standardized components wherever possible to keep costs down; building to insurance company design requirements to keep repair cost as low as possible; etc.

Tesla Model S

But good design is still being done. If you have a chance, take a look at one of the most striking new cars, the Tesla Model S. A purely electric car that was penned by Franz von Holzhausen. Its clean and simple lines are a testament to the response Ettore Bugatti is purported to have given to the question, "Mr. Bugatti, how do you know when a design is complete?" His reply, "When there is nothing left to take away." Bravo.

The 2016 smart fortwo

Well the long wait is over! Daimler AG, the parent company of smart, has finally debuted the next generation smart fortwo and forfour cars. I think the fortwo looks fantastic, the fourfor not so much. I'm not heartbroken we likely won't be getting the four-seat forfour here in North America. Hopefully the wait for the new fortwo might not be too long.

Incidentally Daimler AG makes over 100 models of cars and trucks, including: Mercedes Benz, Freightliner Trucks, and even Western Star Trucks (which used to be built right here in Kelowna, BC). In my whole working career, my favourite job was the years I spent as a technical illustrator in Western Star's Publications Dept. Jack, Brian and I, did great work and had fun doing it too – what could have been better?  

I've always liked small, light cars. Something I had in common with the late Colin Chapman, founder of Lotus Racing Cars, who often said, "Adding power makes you faster on the straights, subtracting weight makes you faster everywhere.” But I digress, this post is supposed to be about the new smart fortwo (note the name is NEVER capitalized), which was a joint project between Mercedes and Renault. The two marques share the basic chassis and many mechanical bits.

WHAT HASN'T CHANGED?
Overall Length: stays at 2.69 metres (8 feet, 10 inches).
The Chassis: which smart calls the Tridion Safety Cell, actually surrounds the vehicle (it's the orange part on this car). I've often thought it's much like sitting INSIDE an enlarged racing helmet.
Plastic Body Panels: No door dings, no rust. If you decide you want to change the colour of your car, new panels can be fitted in about an hour. I've even heard of people who have two sets and change them to match the seasons.
Rear Engine: initially consisting of two, three-cylinder engines one naturally aspirated producing 71 horses and a turbocharged unit with 90 horsepower. Which engine would I choose... duh!
Split Section Tailgate: The back window goes up and a tailgate, much like a pickup truck's, swings down. Our 2005 smart, has this useful feature, which has enabled us to carry large items and on occasion use it as a picnic seat.
Active and Passive Safety Features: Having access to Mercedes engineering expertise and their parts bin enables smart to incorporate a great many safety features other small car manufacturers only dream of having in their cars.

WHAT'S NEW?
Let's start with the look: smart calls the shape of the car a 1-1/2 box design. The more prominent nose of the car being the 1/2 box part of the equation. I quite like the look of this new car, although I've never been a fan of the two-tone paint schemes seen on most smarts, preferring a more monochromatic paint scheme. Our smart, who we have named "Mr. Pants" looks "menacing" in all black.

The Interior: The big news here is space, more of it. The car is still strictly a two-seater (although my buddy Jack has ridden sideways in the back of our smart). The new car is nearly four inches wider than the last generation. Although I've never felt cramped in our car, the extra width in the new model would be welcome. If Jack were to climb in the back he'd appreciate the increased legroom that extra width would allow.
There's many new details in the interior that are interesting, including the floating infotainment system in the centre of the dash. I like the relocation of the tachometer to a pod above the upper left side of the instrument panel.
Suspension: In their press release smart says the suspension has been upgraded for a smoother ride and for gentle understeering handling. I don't like the sound of that, but in the next sentence of their release they mention a sport suspension will also be available... hooray! Elderly Aunt Martha might like a car with numb handling, but anyone who actually LIKES driving will opt for the sport pkg.
Two Transmissions: I've saved the best for last! Our 2005 diesel smart fortwo, has a six speed manual transmission with a computer controlled clutch. I ordered the car with the paddle shift option and it works just fine. The speed at which the transmission shifts is about what a human would do during normal driving. The 2008 generation smart replaced that six speed with a five speed which seems to have both a torque converter and a clutch – hmmm that reminds me of the Fluid Drive Chrysler products of the late forties and early fifties. That 2008 edition has often been criticized for its slow shifting.
That's all gone! The new smart has two transmission options: a true five speed standard with a real third pedal on the floor, and a computer controlled unit which they call the "twinamic six-speed dual clutch transmission" – which hopefully will shift like the similarly described transmissions found in Porsches, Audis and Ferraris.
A New Mr Pants! I can easily visualize him sitting in our driveway, a new all black fortwo with the turbo engine, the five speed and sport suspension. I'll take those all black wheels too! Maybe a darker tint on the windows. Just what I'd need to tangle with Fiat 500 Abarths and the like. Who says I'm not a bad boy? (Just kidding, I've recently been told, more than once, I drive like a grampa.)
So there you have it, a short intro of the new 2016 fortwo. If you'd like to read more and see 99 more pics, check out: The new smart fortwo by Daimler AG
You might have recognized me standing next to the new smart in the opening photo and sitting in the car in the second shot. I was tempted spin a tale about us, while in Germany recently, having come across a secret photoshoot of the new car in the old town of Heidelberg, but alas, I'm in the pictures thanks to photoshop.

About Tailgating...

From Wikipedia: Tailgating is the practice of driving on a road too close to a frontward vehicle, at a distance which does not guarantee that stopping to avoid collision is possible.

You're driving along, minding your own business, when a car looms into your rearview mirror. As it gets closer and Closer and CLOSER your blood pressure rises. Nothing spoils a nice drive quicker than having a tailgater wanting to climb into your back seat! I've spent decades observing this deviant driving behaviour. For your enlightenment, I've listed the types of tailgaters I've encountered:

Miss Chronic Speeder
She's around nineteen years old, usually quite intelligent in all other aspects of her life – but when it comes to driving, she's learned a truckload of bad habits from her peers. Primarily she is a chronic speeder, always moving at least fifteen kilometres an hour faster than the surrounding traffic. When she comes up behind a car travelling at or slightly above the posted limit, she immediately feels the denial of speed, and will slowly tiptoe closer and closer to your rear bumper, hoping she can push you to go faster. While not aggressive in nature, this tailgater is no less dangerous as her addiction to speeding will drive her to take risks with YOUR life.

Mister Teenage Racer
This young man has a brand new "N" sticker on the back of his car. With three weeks of driving experience under his belt, he knows everything there is to know about car control. Overwhelmingly confident in his driving skills, he will risk all to get a hundred feet up the road two seconds quicker. You'll see him approaching in your rearview, weaving from lane to lane. Once directly behind you, he'll be looking for an opening to squeeze into to get past you. Be on guard for him to immediately swerve back in front of you as soon as he can. Get away from this driver as quickly as possible, he is going to cause a crash likely sooner than later.

The Rubber Band Driver
This type of tailgater is one of the most dangerous. Their inattention to driving means they don't notice they're not matching the speed of traffic, until they're WAY TOO CLOSE to the car in front, then slowing down too much and falling behind. This pattern repeats endlessly, hence the name "Rubber Band." When situations arise, this driver's lackadaisical attitude to driving makes them slow to react. If you have to brake suddenly when they are in the "TOO CLOSE" phase behind you, expect to be exchanging info on the side of the road.

The Distracted Driver
It could be the kids in the back seat, a dripping sandwich, the spilled coffee, the urgent text needing a reply, or an intense cell phone conversation that lies behind this driver's close proximity to the car they're following. As with the Rubber Band Driver, their distraction will also lengthen their reaction time should a situation arise. In addition to tailgating, this driver can be expected to wander out of their lane AND over the centreline. BEWARE!

The Sociopath
This deviant has no regard for anyone else on the road. Fortunately they are the rarest form of tailgater. If you're lucky, you'll never have dealings with one. But even one encounter with this type of tailgater can be life-altering. They will be so close behind you will be able to clearly see the evil madness in their eyes. Don't try the little tap tap warning on your brake pedal – this instantly increases their rage! They are likely to immediately retaliate by giving your rear bumper a less than delicate nudge. Do whatever it takes to get away from this menace. Adding to this tailgater's bouquet are the high probability they don't have insurance, or a valid driver's licence. They also might be in a stolen car and may also have an outstanding warrant for their arrest. My friend Jeff would call these low-lifes, "A waste of skin!" 

So there you have it, some of the more prominent types of tailgaters. There are more but these cover the major categories. There's only one item left to discuss on this topic, and that is to give you a way to determine whether or not you're a tailgater. Often the tailgater has no idea of their affliction – perhaps the following Top Ten list will help...

Top Ten Signs You're A Tailgater
1. When you're following another car you can easily read the expiry date on the license plate tag.
2. The car you're following often seems to have a short in their brake lights – they continuously blink on and off.
3. Your front seat passengers are always leaning back in their seat, arms braced on the dashboard while quietly reciting the prayer, "Please let me live through this ride."
4. When it's your turn to drive the carpool, everyone else calls in sick.
5. Your significant other often says, "Honey, you're tired, let me drive."
6. Usually happy and carefree, your kids take on a totally different mindset as you strap them in. Once underway, the oldest keeps reminding the younger ones to "stay in the brace for impact position!"
7. You pick up a hitchhiker, who says he's on a cross-country tour. But after only a mile or so, he says in a trembling high-pitched voice, "Here's my stop, you can let me out right here!"
8. You've found a Safe Driving Manual tucked under your windshield wiper. Thumbing through the book you see the section on tailgating has been highlighted. 
9. It's so annoying, your front seat passengers are often thumping their right foot on the floorboard. "It's as if they're pushing a brake pedal," you think to yourself.
10. You're following a tough-looking guy on a big noisy chopper motorcycle. Suddenly he veers to the right, slows down, kicks your door and screams, "BACK OFF YOU TAILGATING MORON!"

I've tried to inject a bit of humour into what is a serious danger to us all when we're on the road. It is my sincere hope that this posting will prompt you to assess your driving habits. If you find yourself admitting to being a tailgater – amend your ways!

In closing, here's a link to a wikipedia page discussing how to properly gauge what is a safe following distance. Please have a look at: The Two Second Rule.